Thursday, September 24, 2009

Whose the Real Hater

#phrasesihate was a trending topic today on twitter, and I began to think about how much I HATE the way people use the term "HATERS" Now, by definition "hater" just means "one who hates". But, of course over time negros decide that it has a more complex definition which is as follows: "One who hates; One who expresses unfounded or inappropriate hatred or dislike, particularly if motivated by jealousy" . What I find funny about this is when i hear most people refer to the alleged haters, their shit is often FOUNDED and APPROPRIATE and totally uninspired by JEALOUSY.

For example: You've fucked every athlete & entertainer that has stepped in to the city, so we call you a GROUPIE, you call us "haters". >>>but isn't this a fact? I much rather be labeled a groupie than just a WHORE, at least it sounds ambitious.

You boast about a lifestyle that you are not living, by any means and we say your a liar.>>is that hating? or just making an observation based on facts?

You are having a sexual relationship with someone and you post pictures all over the web for everyone to see and the sex partner finds out about it, are the people that told the person a Jealous hater, or are you the hater because you put their business out in the street?

You get where I am going with this, right? To me hating is the anger or the weak. A hater can only hate on what they can't have or with someone they can't compete with. So when people say "your a hater" or "your hating is making me famous" I really want folks to take a second and think if they actually having something going that is worthy of hate. I mean who really would be jealous of someone who really when you think about it has nothing? So what you gave R. Kelly some head, or fucked Ocho Cinco or in the fairtale world which is your head you are jetsetting and living a glamourous life? I mean the only thing that could bring any hate up out of me is someone hurting me or my family, and sometimes it is what you folks that have so many "haters" are doing.
So, instead of stepping your "pussy up" (in the remarkable words of Trina) how about you work on making yourself a more productive citizen, and take a look at the pic above, and you decide who the real hater is. Thank You and Your Welcome

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

10 Things I Want To Know

10. Why is that when I say I am a college graduate & working in my desired field that people are shocked? Do I just look like my job is being a baby mama? I gotta step my look up.

9. At what point do women start claiming men as their "man" when they have never had a discussion about being in a relationship?

8. Why is it that all the people who have alledgedly moved to the west coast or NYC are always in Detroit...full time? You have not moved away and we know it.

7. Is stunting so important that you must buy fake merchandise to impress people who can't afford the stuff anyway?

6. Why do men withhold the fact that they have children? I don't know about most broads but Family is number one on my list of priorities when it comes to selecting a mate, if you fail to mention or discuss the importance early...I don't want cha. Read "Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man".

5. Is it me or has ever since Danger Smashed The Homie has every man been on a conquest to smash one of your homies? Imma about to start smashing homies too forget it.

4. If I didn't want to holla ten years ago (when I was young and impressionable) why would I want to holla when I am grown and well seasoned? think about it loser.

3. Why do people try and make out what they are doing as being so grandeur and it really is quit minimal? For example folks say: I own a Marketing and Events Planning company and we do events all over the country with the hottest celebs. This translates to: I do parties in a small city and sometimes my friend who is boning this dude that plays for the Lions comes through. I also go party outta town and act like its my event. DOUCHE BAG.

2. Is twitter real life? How is it that my 140 characters ruins lives and crushing self esteem?

1. How much money does it cost to get people out of your lives for good? I have some folks I don't wanna be bothered with anymore.

Sunday, August 16, 2009

Are You a Nigga or Black?

What is Blackness? It clear that it is not really a hue of skin because if it was we'd walk the streets in a sea of crayola black people. Black is a culture that is diversified as all other ethnicities clumped together. Black the race is random, just like the colors that make it. Black is an eclectic mix that if you dipped your finger in it you never know what your going to get.

Race is a topic that the most vocal on it are generally the least educated on it, especially amongst the Black community. Recently I was leaving a majority Black nightclub and witness some of the least flattering part of my race. A huddle of "rats" drunk and squabbling with each other. Then gunshots rang out as the police chased some random fools that probably got a little too crunk after spending their entire paycheck on a bottle of moet while listening to Gucci Mane. I tweeted the events and concluded my commentary with "I hate Black People". The statement may not be something some folks would like to hear, but honestly at that moment I did hate those Black people I was surrounded by.

Soon following, I recieved multiple tweets from folks who I would like to call the "Vocal 30%". You know the ones that make the most noise but aren't really talking about anything? I read I was racist, A Wendy Williams the dude look alike and I was also called a chickhead bitch. Whats so funny about this is that all those idiotic statements made me even further "hate" those kinds of black folks.

Let me tell you about the type that I am talking about:
I am talking about the ones with the least knowledge on any subject who have the most to say. The ones that act a total ass in establishments and expect you to be on their side. The ones who make up words when they suddenly want to be respected that make them look even more idiotic.

I know this may sound like I am uppidity as I was told by one of these dummies, But, I am so far from uppidity because I come from the same place as these people. My family wasn't rich, I don't think I am white (nor do I want to be) and I don't think I am better than you. What I do think is that I am educated responder. My parents and grandparents taught me from an early age to "think before you speak" and to always make sure that your behaviors and statements are backed up by a valid argument (i.e. facts) not silly insults or things that will make me look foolish.

I think that our country is getting polluted with niggas. And by Niggas I mean those who are depriving THEMSELVES of social, economic and political equality by their behavior, their drive and their morality. We are living in the era of folks that are so focused on being "stuntastic" that haven't realized that the things they are doing are depriving them of opportunities. And while they participate in this foolery, these foreigners are taking advantage of all their opportunties and LIVING the GOOD LIFE. I want to really do my part and help rid our world of Niggas.

So this is what I suggest:

  • Know the definition of Racist before you go throwing the term around. (This is the belief that a certain race is superior than another) You have to understand that a Black racist in powerless, because of my black skin I don't have the power to subvert an entire race.
  • Read a Book or Watch a DVD. I will perpetuate a stereotype and say that "niggas" don't read, but educated Blacks do. Check out the documentary "Ethnic Notions"if you can't bring yourself to read up on black history.
  • Education, get some. There are too may educational opportunities in the world for anyone to just be walking around this joint with a high school diploma. Hell, go to Everest Institute and get a degree in medical billing something.
  • Avoid cyberbeefs with people who are more educated than you. In the end you will look like a douchebag or a NIGGA.
  • Write a Life Plan. Do you want to be still working at CVS in the next five years? Hey if you do at least put yourself on track to be a manager or franchisee.

Sunday, August 9, 2009

This Bitch is Crazy

It is pure comedy to me when I hear men saying "This bitch is crazy". Now I will admit that I have had my run ins with the just run of the mill cuuks/crazo/delusional stalker broad, but I can say the 9 times out of ten even those women have been lead on or sold a dream in some kind of way for them to believe that they are in the "wifey" category.
With that said I am going to talk about the 30% rule.
I had an enlightening 5 hour conversation with a former significant other about his women trouble and why he seems to attract all the women that go HAM. We'll call him, Mr. Congeniality. Mr. Congeniality has than winning personality that has the bitches swooning. Not only that in a dusty ass city that we call Detroit, he would be considered one of the biggest bosses that we've seen ...thus or as of lately. In laymen's terms dudes a celeb and pockets are stacked. Because he is so likeable and doesn't want word to get on the street that his dick game ain't right, he has fallen into to the bad habit of giving bitches his best, despite his general disinterest in being in a serious relationship with anyone.

Here are a few examples of giving people the wrong idea:
  • Giving your best sex (oral or otherwise) i.e. turning people out
  • Financing any expense. The whole "it ain't trickin if you got it" mentality it is tricking and broads think you like them for it especially those with a impaired mental capacity.
  • Letting people stay overnight.
  • Posing for pictures at the club. I know it shouldn't be taking this far, but this is how broads start cyber beefs. All they want is that one shot to use on a blog or myspace or FB to prove their significance.
  • Having random women/men around your kids.
  • calling or texting everyday or throughout the day.

I know some of this may seem outlandish, but you have to realized all these these things combine contribution to someone poppin off on you because they thought you were kicking it.

If you are only wanting to have a jumpoff why are you doing things that are reserved for someone you are in a relationship with? Oh I know why, you the crazy bitch that likes the drama.

Friday, August 7, 2009

What is He Stoopid?

What is it about playing with balls for massive stacks that makes a man lose all good sense, values and morals?

In the wake of the Steve McNair murder, many ballers are supposedly getting their behavior in check because "bitches are crazy out here", but I've been wondering for the longest "dude why don't you think you are crazy?"
Just think about it. How is it that the amount of money you have in your pocket or the number of times your face shows up on ESPN enables you to strip yourself of all good judgement and behave as if you were someone who was sheltered from or had limited interaction with real life? defines Social retardation as: when someone lacks the social skills that normal people developed in high school. They missed out on normal socialization because they were outcasts, more than likely because they were physically unattractive, but that is not always the case. Attractive people can be affected by this when they are only liked BECAUSE of their looks and nothing else. Usually occurs in males. Excessive internet use is also a dominant cause.
Now after reading that definition, you can clearly see that most athletes fit into "attractive catergory" not because of their looks but more because their pockets or lifestyle is attractive. Just look at Terrell Owens, that dude has the personality of a door knob but still for some reason he can keep a fresh pussy at his door step. At first glance to most men and some women, hey this type of lifestyle or behavior may sound like something you could see yourself falling into. The fact that these men lose the ability to have normal social interaction with almost everyone, including the people who were there before the game, shows clearly that there is something about being a man that plays with balls that skews their perspective on life.
Drug addiction and prostitution are considered to be "urban social problems" that arise because of class issues, but what is it when someone's pockets are of the elite class and their behavior is of the gutter? You end up with this socially retarded fool with hella babies, with hella women, making it rain in the club and stepping out on his wife to fuck with a young ass other who eventually blow his brains out because she thought this was her come up. Its unfortunate, but the reality is that these athletes need to realize you are no King Kong. The world doesn't revolve around you because bitches will do anything for a dollar its a reccession. So, instead of focusing on your "stuntastics" how about focusing on being a whole man. A man that sees that for every action there is an equal or greater reaction, you can't sell bitches a dream and give them the bullshit. You can't do whatever you want and think that there is no recorse. Its just not realistic. And no matter how many bitches eat your ass or buy their own plan ticket to come see you, you gotta realize no matter what everyone has ulterior motives. There aren't too many people nowadays that do thinks for the greater good or to just be nice...if someone tells you that they are PHONY. Protect your family and most importantly protect yourself, you are all you've got.

Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Welcome To My World

Someone on the outside looking in may see me as the one who always has the jokes, but the sad truth is honestly when I say what I is not a joke. I really believe what I say, and sometimes it may sound funny! That is the fabulousness of what is LAUREN MO-FO'in LEE! lol
I am a educated, quirky, sarcastic, impulsive, random, crazy, sexy, cool chick that is just looking for somewhere to vent, and so HERE I AM. LETS GET IT!